The Three Worst Dates I Ever Had

Drum roll please ....

3. A rose, a meal and an extra guy. That's right. The girl brought a guy on the date with her. Particularly humiliating was the fact that I had told the waitress table for two and then waited an hour before she showed up.

2. After not sleeping for three days a late night dinner at a place I could only describe as an Italian picnic and drinks at a bar (I'm straight edge) with marketing execs for Drug Companies that extolled the virtues of Hoboken and a soon to be Reality Star and his wife who kept telling my girlfriend that I liked them better than the other couple.

1. Smackdown! After promising to take her family to a (at the time) WWF event at Nassau Coliseum, and after we arrived at the coliseum in her car, my girlfriend decided she didn't want to go in to the event and split. After a loud show where her nephew pressed my hands against his ears for three hours, after a trip to the bathroom covered in vomit, we went outside and my girlfriend revealed that she had dropped me and her family to go on a date with another guy who she brought with her to meet me (lightening strikes twice). After a fight where she ordered me to get int the car, I, with my Scooby Doo backpack (a Christmas gift from my girlfriend) thrown over my shoulder, walked back to Mineola in the rain while limousines filled with wrestlers drove by.

My five most Romantic dates:

Here's a sweet journey down memory lane and a set-up for my next post.

1. Watching the Disney movie Tarzan and then sitting in the trees with my "Jane."

2. A tour of the Hindu exhibits of the Metropolitan Museum of Art with a sweet and sensitive Brahman class girl, who made the imagery understandable and relevant.

3. Karaoke Night at a Manhattan Japanese restaurant where I was put on the spot to entertain a bunch of people I didn't know and wowed them with everything from David Bowie to Cher.

4. Learning to do the the Hustle by videotape in a living room in Long Beach.

5. A homemade dinner in Chelsea with the girl of my dreams.