Maverick finds his Goose, but Hopefully Doesn't Goose his Find

Barely containing his despise for Katie Couric, Bob Schaffer told her on the CBS Evening News that John McCain's choice of running mate was reminiscent of McCain's old "maverick" style (More TV's Maverick James Garner, less Tom Cruise in Top Gun). So let's define Maverick by breaking down the choice of Sarah Palin.

1. She's woman. Say ... isn't that a coincidence? Why just a few weeks ago a prominent woman was running in the other party. She didn't get picked now there is some word that her supporters are pretty peeved. I guess Maverick is synonymous with Serendipitous.

2. She appeals to working class men. This makes me laugh when coupled with the description of her as a former beauty queen. She is an attractive woman, but it's like they're asking those blue collar men, "Who would you rather see in a swimsuit competition, her or Joe Biden?" My response of course would be, "Well, will they be wearing a one-piece or two-?" Maverick means horny. Other famous Mavericks include Hugh Hefner, Bob Guccione and President Bill Clinton.

3. She's an NRA member (a group McCain has sewn up), anti abortion (voting for McCain anyway), and from Alaska (a well-known Red State.) Maverick means "redundant." And by redundant I mean not needed because it is already covered (A little evergreen redundancy joke for you).

4. She's young and a novice when it comes to world politics. Sound like anyone else in the campaign? Someone who has a great deal of popularity and gets attacked for these same reasons? Maverick means jealous. A Maverick wants a ticket considered too old and too young, too insider and too outsider, too man and too woman, too hot (Arizona) and too cold (Alaska). The bumper stickers should be the two of them contorted into a yin yang.

5. She's being investigated for a scandal in which she was pressuring people to fire her ex-brother in law. Maverick, like TNT means Drama!

6. She's a self described Hockey mom. And what sport is more popular in the US than hockey? Other than Baseball and Football and Basketball, Golf, Volleyball, Gymnastics, Swimming, Bowling, (752 other sports deleted for space ) ... Skeet shooting, a Spelling Bee, Tiddlywinks. But after those, Hockey is the Game! At least, he'll win over all those Canadian expatriates. Maverick means longshot.